Right now i miss getting texts that tell Me I'm beautiful. From someone of the opposite gender( thoughts still appreciated mom) and occasionally I listen to creep by radio head and feel like that sums me up. You're a beautiful angel and I'm a creep and a
Weirdo.
Par for the course. I sleep with a bottle of moisturizer IN my bed with me. Loser status I know. And I know more teachers than I do students. I sometimes don't want to be all cute and bubbly and nice to people. Sometimes I want to walk past someone I know and not be all charming. In fact I actually want to hit some people. Like sock em in the balls. I finished a whole 2 years of Spanish in three months. I'm just now beginning to let myself believe that graduating early Might really happen and I can really start over. I don't know what is pushing me to leave, but I'm getting pulled like a little red wagon,
I can't avoid where I end up. And I know that little old Utah is not where I want to be. Yes I am a girl and I want to be a mom. And be a wife. But I am scared shitless of falling in love and getting married. I have my whole life to be a domestic kind of woman. And I feel so much pressure living here to get married and pop out Babies. I have to leave. I want to live. I want to explore. Try new foods. Go to college. Become a doctor. Write. Read. Help uneducated women. Paint a master piece. Sing. Ski. Meditate. I have to leave. I dont know why so I will. But I will also enjoy my time here.
{peace, love, and granola bars}
